Southie Park: Hey, At least we’re really from Southie

Fuck you, Real Housewives of South Boston!  This project was born down on A Street and raised up on B street.

Saving Spaces for Southie’s Faces

Okay, so another long-fought battle with the yuppies has been the concept of using trash to save parking spaces after a snow storm.  Yuppies think they’re badasses because they move the space-savers to use the spot for themselves, but true South Bostonians win out in the end with a few swipes of their car key to that blue Prius.  Anyway, the South Bostonians also won out on Menino, as we now have an excuse to get rid of all those broken TV’s the garbage men refused to pick up.  Thanks Menino, you fucking douche!

But you don’t have to take my WORD for it! (Reading Rainbow reference) Billy Baker, from the Boston Globe, did some research in this article.

Failway Bark

Yesterday, Fenway Bark founder Jane Fulton announced, amid several paragraphs of mean-spirited sarcasm and bullshittery, that the fancy kennel she is trying to open in Southie is changing prospective locations.

In case you’ve missed our commentary on Fenway Bark thus far, it’s first here and then here, and kind of here.  Unfortunately, our disagreements with Ms Fulton et al, which recently resulted in Fenway Bark’s permanent Shit List-ification, have descended in tone to the level of ad hominem verbal aggression.  So, with that in mind, I’d like to say that Fenway Bark is gay.  Gay, gay, gay. Continue reading

The Sunday Paper – Special Labor Day Edition

You’re fired!

Happy Labor Day. It’s the Sunday Paper! Continue reading

The Sunday Paper

Oh shit, velociraptor on a bicycle!

It’s the Sunday Paper! Continue reading

Sinners, Repent!

Recently, the Staker’s critics have been engaging in somewhat of a feeding frenzy.  I can call it that because we don’t get your standard, run-of-the-mill internet trolls on this blog.  We only get people who actively dislike us specifically.  And I love that!  It means that I’m getting my point across.

To offer a little background, the Staker has garnered Shack heat for making the following two innocuous assertions:

  1. Crime fiction based in Southie is an idea that is played out.
  2. Fenway Bark is ridiculous.

Everything else I’ve written has been along the lines of How to wrestle a shark and What if Jersey Shore were set in the Congo?. Continue reading

From High Atop The Soap Box: Fenway Bark, You Are On The Shit List!

Not only do yuppies try to shape the grooming landscape, but they try to replace our Pit-bulls and Rottweilers with this genetic abortion.

As my hetero-life-mate, there are many reasons why I love Staker.  I have known him for nearly 17 years, and I remember vividly the day we met in our little league coach’s apartment in the Old Colony Housing Projects.  But of all the reasons why I would love this hairy little grease-ball, I would have to say that I love him most for his ability to piss people off, and attract more violent energy than a hillbilly wearing steel overhauls.

What can also be a tragic character flaw really pays off here on The Shack, and the amount of heat we’ve received for his March 11th post, Passing Judgment on Fenway Bark, has lead us to make new enemeies of Zeltsonic proportions (mainly because his post is number 6 when you Google “fenway bark.”  That can’t be good for business.  Oops!).  Now we don’t really care if you take your dog to a spa, just like we don’t care if you go down to Bella Sante on Newbury Street for a botox and Brazillian.  The point is that there are many more practical uses for the limited property here in South Boston.

Continue reading

Battlefield Southie: The State Rep Candidates Who Love(d) Me

Man, is The Drizzle gonna get in trouble for this one.

If you live in Southie, or come here often for your refills of oxies and heroin, then you’ve come to know three names rather intimately:  Patrick Brennan, Nick Collins, and Michael McGee.  No, these men aren’t distillers of fine scotch and Irish whiskeys, they are candidates for State Representative in Suffolk County’s 4th District.  Now you might ask me, “The Drizzle?!  You’re in the toy department.  You post about dead celebrities, specials, and alcohol(ic) related issues…not politics.  What happened to that fuckthatitude?”  Well I’ll tell you, children.  I’m posting about politics because I now know what it feels like to be a pork loin at a Bar Mitzvah:  Everyone wants a piece of you, but they don’t know how to feel right about it in the morning (“stripper at a bachelor party” and “underage twink at the Tony Awards” are also acceptable analogies).

Continue reading

What Happens at Rainbow Dragon Stays at Rainbow Dragon

We here at the Shack, like many people, are big fans of Chinese food. Drunk or sober, it’s a pretty good bang for your buck. And as with a lot of the things we buy, there’s a fair amount of brand loyalty involved; for example, Drizzle has been known to enjoy a Diet Coke in between PBRs and the Old Man tends to prefer the Glass Slipper to the Foxy Lady. A Chinese food joint that we dig is the Rainbow Dragon on F Street here in Southie, which, among other things, is home to the famous “French Fry Fravy” ($3.95 for the french fries, 50 cents for the fravy). Continue reading